The Winter Tree

I saw you there whimping, cold, and homeless
I opened my arms to you
You've placed your nest, laid your eggs
But you never looked at me did you?

Now the bark is old, my leaves have fallen
Glitters of white begin to fall
You've gathered your children and left me alone in the cold
Sigh. I did my purpose after all.

Subscribe in a reader

How to be Safe on your Blind Dates

As people get attached to mobile phones and social networking sites, the process of courtship becomes different. People get acquaintances from Facebook, or through text messages. Then come the questions: What does s/he look like? Is s/he really the one in the picture? or IS HE A KILLER?

If it's your first time to go on a blind date, it's normal to get nervous. I'll teach you SAFETY tips :D

PREPARING FOR THE BLIND DATE
1. It's up to you if you want to dress to impress or if you want them to "like" you for dressing how you dress.

2. Gear up. Get some emergency supplies (e.g. Umbrella, Cell phone - a no brainer, etc.)

3. Self-defense? Well, I told you to bring an umbrella right?


MEETING YOUR BLIND DATE
Okay, in this section, we're gonna discuss on how to get rid of posers in an instant and to save yourself from a horrible date.

1. Of course there will be a rendezvous point - make sure you agreed to meet in a public place. DON'T go there at once. Go somewhere near - near enough to see the proximity of the rendezvous point. If you're thinking he's a psycho killer, LOOK FOR POSSIBLE ESCAPE ROUTES (do this wherever you guys go)

2. Tell him you're there. Or if he's already there, ask him/er what s/he is wearing. If he asks what you're wearing, then you can answer - you're not "there" anyway.

3. OBSERVE. Is he really the one in the picture?

IF NO. Ask yourself, DO YOU WANT HIM/ER TO BE HURT? or DO YOU WANT TO BE POLITE AND ENDURE A HORRIBLE DATE INSTEAD?
 - for the first one (which is my favorite) tell him this: "You're not my type, thanks for the time anyway."
 - for the second one, then go approach him/er.


NOTE: To be completely safe, BRING A FRIEND!

Subscribe in a reader

My New Baby, Aiken

"I may be single, but at least I got a dog where I can pour all my love on" - Me (2013)

It was after watching The Adventures of Tintin on my laptop where I got the urge of getting myself a mini schnauzer. Why? Well, Snowy is hell cute!!! If you guys don't know who the heck Snowy is, well he's Tintin's mighty, smart doggy sidekick. I don't have time for storytelling, I guess I'll leave that as your homework *wink*. Anyway... Snowy:

I know, he's a wire fox terrier*fail, i know* but they look similar enough. I searched around on how much a mini schnauzer puppy costs, and found out that they costed at a range of 5,000 - 12,000 php. Well, the cheap ones can be found in Sulit.com.ph - that's where I got mine.

I'm thinking your next question is: WHERE DID YOU GET THE MONEY? I got a friend who helped me, I won't deny that. He lent me money and I promised to pay him back as soon as I get a summer job or a part-time job. Sweet huh? So we went on a deal with a seller online. He got his puppies for sale for 6,000php (one of the cheapest). So I bought it ^_^

Cute right? Btw, his name is Aiken. Wanted to change his name, but that's already printed on his papers. So Aiken it is. Aiken is a salt pepper mini schnauzer puppy that's turning 7 months this April 6. He was the most reserved and the most behaved among his siblings. Plus, he has the best fur. That's why I chose him. I want a dog, a companion, that fits my personality - or not. 

He's quiet, he's shy, and he's getting playful already. The problem was that his stools were usually wet to watery, and he would sometimes vomit at night. So I got worried. I took him to UP Diliman Vet Med (where I believe has the cheapest rates: I got 150php for consulation + 60php for fecalysis. If I did go somewhere else, that 210php would not even make it for a consultation fee) and the finding was that he was infected by parasites. *whew, glad I took him to a vet*. Then afterwards I have an exam, so I needed to find someone to leave Aiken with. But that plan failed. No one was available. Guess what I did? We got Aiken inside a large bag and ran inside Engineering building, and left him in KEM tambayan while I took the exam.WILD!!!! So there, I bought him the dewormerafterwards, and I'm gonna buy him his antibiotic and vitamins tomorrow.

Aiken had been my baby ever since he came into my life, and he would continue to be. Any dog lovers around? Feel free to contact me and let's try bonding, like taking our dogs out for a walk..

Aiken needs friends!! Contact me! 09277793039

Hahahaha!

Subscribe in a reader

Not Alone

I have been financially challenged this past week due to a lot of things needed to be paid. I found myself almost bankrupt - that I had to borrow money from my fellow dancers so that I can survive for a few days (yeah, I did this).

One day, I was riding a jeep on my way to school. I found myself short - I needed 37 pesos for our club dinner, around 20 pesos for bus fare, and I am yet to have lunch - I got only 57 pesos. I was about to accept the fact that I won't be able to eat that day. Sad, I know. I needed food to sustain energy for dancing. But how can I? Considering the money I got left, the only choice would be I would eat lunch, and I'd tell the club that I would be paying tomorrow my dinner that night. Whew. Suddenly, my new-found friend texted me "Let's have lunch." I couldn't say no. My tummy would definitely punish me if I did. I went to meet him and was about to tell him that my budget is limited. But then, he treated me lunch. (how sweet right?) ^_^ An answered prayer in disguise. Then he waited for me until midnight to drive me home. <3 p="">

My lunch money for the next few days depended on our boarder's payment for his rent. Unfortunately, he didn't pay yet. I was planning on using some of the money to buy myself my costume for our upcoming concert. But how? Time's running out; I needed to buy those costumes. And I need to eat lunch. I texted a fellow dancer and friend "Girl, can I borrow money? At least 200?." and fortunately, she lent me money. Lunch for the next 2 days, solved. Costumes? I'm dead. My sister gave me 500 pesos for my 2-day lunch money, which by the way, I used to pay our costume for our finale. I still needed an acid wash jeans and a plain black polo. Here comes my friend again (let's call him HERO this time). He offered me to drive and accompany me in Greenhills the next day to buy the costumes which he would shoulder for the mean time. I promised him that I would pay him back. Problems, SOLVED!! 

The next day, we did go to Greenhills and went to Farmer's Plaza to buy me my costumes. Then he treated me breakfast and lunch. Then he drove me home again.

The next day, I was running out of money again, and guess what happened next! Hero treated me lunch out of the blue. He just texted me to come meet him as he would pay the tickets he bought from me. Then he just kept walking to his car, and I just followed. He told me that we would have lunch, at SM Marikina. We did have lunch, but not in SM though. We ended up eating in Banapple, which has great food by the way.

I just feel so blessed, that God, even though I've done so many things that I may not be proud of, is still there for me. He's still there to help me, to reach out for me. He's still there to make me feel that I am not alone in this ragged path that I am facing right now. He's there to show me that He walks with me in this journey even though I may ignore him a lot. I know I'm not worth it, but He just loves me so much. I love you God.

Subscribe in a reader

Diamonds

Have you lived a normal life
And everything turns bad?
Have you experienced
Losing everything you had?

Like leaves of a tree
One by one they fall
When everything's gone
Who would you call?

You stand there, still bald
Are you still sturdy and tall?
When you cried,
Who answered your call?

When lumberjacks chop you
You think you lost it all
Who do you think would
Catch you on your fall?

When you finally fall
And hit it hard on the ground
Who is there
When no one's around?

When you think you lost
You know you are wrong
You're a new sprout
Made to grow strong

In our life
We are never alone
God is above
With love as strong as stone

He pounds us
Until we are refined
With beauty and strength
and wisdom defined

Subscribe in a reader

DOWNFALL

My heart's buried deep
Deep down under the ashes
Ashes of my dreams

Posted via BlogPost

Unloved

I'm a complicated puzzle
Each piece different color
I'm a map waiting to be explored
Half wonders half danger

I may not have the face
Nor the body you desire
I have my own ways
Secrets untranspired

I may seem fierce and strong
But inside I'm effete
My complications make loving me
Such an impossible feat

I'm an animal, wild
Waiting to be tamed
Waiting for someone to show
That love ain't a game

Posted via BlogPost

TORPE

I really love you
You think I don't but I do
I guess it's too late

Subscribe in a reader

Dying Memory

Her smile was from ear to ear that night
Her curly locks shined really bright
She bloomed with floral dress that night
Cerulean cloth with print that's white

Beside her was a man about her height
He wore an olive shirt that hugged his body tight
His skin wasn't too dark, wasn't too light
His smile was a bit sided to the right

Between them was a boy half their height
His skin was almost as light as white
His eyes - his black orbs sparkled so bright
His smile shouted "no problems in sight"

But then the look in his eyes changed
As no trace of joy remained
The smile on their faces was definitely gone
What has just begun?

The man and the woman's face got erased
As a stench of gloom my nose embraced
I looked upon the boy's face that I once knew
His face distorted, "who are you?"

He closed his eyes as he cried a tear
As flames of red and orange start to appear
The flames licked and devoured the sides
An endless memory was about to die

My parents are gone, they don't want me no more
They raised a child that just didn't care anymore
With a heart of stone, and soul of anger
I just turned my back on my mother and father

They're gone now so how can they know
I loved them truly but it just didn't show
But it's too late, I missed their train
But I hope it's not too late for me to heal the pain

Subscribe in a reader

DANCE

On the stage again
It's time to dance my heart out
The spotlight's on me

Posted via BlogPost

Stupid Me

I watched the world around me live
As I sit here still on my post
Still regretting that I've done
Something stupid with a great cost

Costed me the chance to love you
The chance to have you
Right now I wonder
Can we start anew?

My world was dark before
And now I'm just blinded
I let my emotions take over me
And now my heart is dead

I didn't mean to hurt you
Didn't mean to cause you pain
I learned my lesson the hard way
Now my heart won't beat again

Posted via BlogPost

Puppet Master

Here's master again

Coming in with a grin

One move from his hand

One move from his finger

I get into a trance

Can't resist his order

I walk there, I go here

His laugh and his clap all I could hear

I tried to reach for him

He's too far away

He commanded with a grin

Must obey right away

I remembered I got strings

Both my heart and my limbs

My feelings wouldn't count

My feelings wouldn't count

He enjoys the show and the fact

that My feelings wouldn't count

And after the show

I lay here again

Waiting for tomorrow

To be played with again

A different master?

I don't care. They're all the same

Subscribe in a reader

Dream Journal 005

My "classmates" and I went on a trip with a "professor" in an arcade. We were required to play a game, and the one with the highest score would win a prize (or maybe the highest grade, I forgot). The machine is designed with a lot of coin slots on it, and painted with anime girls - the characters in the game. You had to kill monsters that would appear in the screen using the gun provided. I let my classmates go first. I watched them play and all of them got somewhat low scores. I knew I got a shot at it - I knew I'd beat them. 

It was my turn now. I tried to insert a coin - a one peso coin - into the machine and I saw the sign "insert three tokens". Well duh! It would always be tokens. Why in the hell would I even insert one peso coins? I went to the ticket booth and asked for three tokens. I went back to the machine. I inserted all coins in one coin slot, and when I'm ready to play - the electricity went out. The screen went all noisy, and the machines all restarted. Once the machine was okay again, I inserted all coins again. Then the electricity went out again. It's like I wasn't even meant to play the game. My professor suggested that I was putting the coins in the wrong slot. I looked for another coin slot but then again, all of them was so thin that I doubted the tokens would even fit. Someone came - I didn't get to see his face but that's when my dream ended. I didn't know if I got to play the game or not. I didn't know if I got to win the highest score in the class. Who was that someone anyway?

Subscribe in a reader

Sinister (2012)

SINISTER (2012)

Director: Scott Derrickson
Writers: Scott Derrickson (Screenplay), C. Robert Cargill
Stars: Ethan Hawke, Juliet Rylance and James Ransone

My Rating: 4.5/5


"When the lights go off, you're in for a big fright"

The movie opens as if it's a detective movie (well, yay for me. My brain's gonna work again) wherein you think it's gonna be just about solving how someone died, where the body is hidden, or maybe have some confrontation with the killer. Yes, it was that at first but then the film transitions into a paranormal, mystery one. 

You're gonna keep on guessing who the killer was, and it would definitely the one you've not suspected - well maybe if you pay attention to some of the details of the movie. But then again, I didn't suspect --- to be the killer in the movie. 

It's a fun watch, probably get a few good screams in it. When the lights go off, you're in danger. ^_^ I screamed, worse than my scream while watching Insidious. There would be scenes that would be very disturbing of course. If you're not used to seeing blood, well you have the options to close your eyes anyway. Story wise and fright wise, it's a good movie. If you want a good mystery-solving-scary-enough film, this one's for you.

Subscribe in a reader

Dream Journal 004

I had a nightmare a while ago, and I thought of sharing it to you guys. I wanted to tell it the normal narrative way but then I was so inspired that I felt it would be a waste if I didn't write it in a poem. Here it goes:

It was after school,

"Get home immediately" was the rule;

As I approached, I breathed deep,

And smiled. Mom was waiting in our keep;

The walls were white, the roof mahogany,

And a tall white door stood in front of me;

As I entered, everything changed,

It just became very strange;

The place was dark and was filled with reek,

With a brown spiral staircase that ran very deep;

I slowly descended down the stairs,

And on the ground floor I became aware;

A doorway that stood very tall,

A doorway that led to a bright white hall;

It was probably the only light source around,

It was our house, but I was not very proud;

"Where is my mom?" I began to wonder,

Somewhere in the hall, I knew I'd find her;

On each side were olive green chairs,

And at the end was her with her black silky hair;

I ran to her and told her something,

Maybe something not worth remembering;

I looked around. The hall was then filled,

With people that stood perfectly still;

They stood there and looked at me,

It's as if they wanted to kill me;

As fast as I could, I ran away,

I knew I'd die if I would stay;

Before I could get out, a man stood my way,

He grabbed me by the wrist, but I got away;

I ran towards the stairs and looked over my shoulder,

He was following, his eyes filled with anger;

He shouted something over and over,

His shouts then became louder and louder;

Through the long flight of stairs I ran at my best,

But he grabbed my ankle and I fell on my chest;

I turned around and he was there,

Finally killing me with his creepy stare.

Subscribe in a reader

Worse Than Death

I'm disappointed of what I've become

I want myself dead; want myself gone

I don't want another day in hell

I want myself dead; everyone can tell

I'd hit my head against the wall

I'd hit it again with a basketball

I'd crush my fingers with a vice grip

Fascination comes with the blood that drips

Middle of the highway, there I'd sit

Hoping a ten-wheeler I would meet

I'd crush my hands in a blender

Blood goes splat on every corner

I'd throw myself in an acid bath

My skin slowly burns; I'd enjoy the wrath

With a grin on my face, I'd grab a nail gun

Point it at my head, BANG, I'm gone

Hundred ways I'd kill myself

But something would top the list

Thousand ways I'd kill myself

A day without you is worse than this

Subscribe in a reader

Feelings on Paper

I think of you day and night

I really can't help this feeling inside

I close my eyes, I see your lips so tender

Redness of cherries I remember

Your eyes, those large black orbs

They glisten, they sparkle, they I adore

You're like a portrait, a Mona Lisa

Imprinted on my mind

And now here are my feelings on paper

I hope you don't mind

I look out the window, I can't help but think

This feeling tattooed on my heart like ink

I'm afraid that you might be thinking

Of someone else, I'm a memory fading

Your problems I cannot bear

Was it wrong to care?

And now, my feelings are on paper

I know it may mean nothing to you

But please, let me say this once more

I want you to know that I LOVE YOU

Subscribe in a reader

Accusations

I was dilly-dallying with my boyfriend over the phone. I came to the point where I told him how my day went. I told him that I woke up at around 11am, and I wasn't about to wake up until a friend called me. I told him that my friend was asking for an advice about his love life situation and I gladly did since he was a friend of mine. Then my boyfriend hung up on me. BAAM!

I texted him "Why did you hang up on me?"

Was he JUST A FRIEND?

Yeah! He was an old friend of mine.

Are you sure nothing happened between you two?

He was just a friend! He just called me because he was seeking for advice!

Who are you fooling?

Darn, he was so shallow. What did I do? I just helped an old friend of mine with his situation and then I got accused of cheating because of it? What happened between us? Well, I gave him advice. It's not because he called that there would be something happening between us? Phone sex? Really? I couldn't believe I entered a relationship without a warning label: To enter this relationship, please delete all friends. No thanks!

Subscribe in a reader

Job 6:14

I've been reading Job this evening and I came across Chapter 6. There were lines about Job's thoughts on friendship but one line struck me the most:

Job 6: 14
A friend owes kindness to one in despair, though he have forsaken the fear of the Almighty.

A true friend will always be there for you. Will it be money issues, love life issues, and such, but a true friend will ALWAYS be there. Even if you "have forsaken the fear of the Almighty." True friends stick like a tattoo no matter how bad you have become, they'd always lend a helping hand to put you back on track. And with what I have been going through right now, I came to realize that I was blessed by God. He gave me pretty and handsome friends who never fails to give me guidance and advice whenever I need them the most. Even though I haven't shown my affection to them, I love them. Thank you guys.

Subscribe in a reader

The Grip on the Wheel

My classes were over, and I needed to do one more thing before I could get home - get a new ID. To get to the cashier, I would have to ride an IKOT jeep. So, I did. I reached my back pocket and grabbed my coins, counted them and reached them to the driver. Bayad po I said. After the gentleman on my right kindly reached my payment to the driver I looked outside the "window". 

Para ho, a female voice said. It was coming from my left.

Para ho, she said again. But the jeep kept on going.

Para daw po I said. But then it was no use. It was until the guy right behind the driver poked him gently on the shoulder and said manong, para daw that the jeep finally went to a stop. 

The jeep continued on its route. Some passengers got off board and new passengers came in. We passed Kalayaan Residence Hall when a girl said para po. And again, the jeep kept on going. Para ho she said again. No use. The jeep kept on going, but the driver reached his hand back - maybe he heard bayad po instead of para po I thought. That was pretty normal. The girl went to try again. Para ho a final time until this kuya finally shouted Para!!. Kinda mean though. But then again if I was in his place, I would have been feeling the same. It would be definitely irritating to hear para po a couple of times over and over, and it would have been irritating to say para ho over and over but still it wasn't heard by the driver. 

When the driver reached his hand, I saw something I really didn't notice before. His hands was wrinkly - prune-y i may say - and were shaking as he stretched it farther. Afterwards he proceeded into gripping the steering wheel. His grip wasn't firm - well wasn't as firm as his grip was year before. He was just unsteady. He looked at the mirror. I glanced at him and it all struck me. He shouldn't be working at that age. He should be enjoying the life he may still have not enjoyed before. But I guess he HAD to. The hardship of living in the Philippines with little to none everyday profit showed in his eyes. He shouldn't be working. He should be enjoying. But then, when obligation comes in, you'd have to forget about enjoying life - even the last few years of it. His grip on the steering wheel showed his determination, perseverance, and his desire for his family to live a healthy life as possible. I couldn't do anything. At least I know that as long as his grip on that steering wheel is as firm as it is now, well I'm sure his family would have someone there taking care of them.

Subscribe in a reader