Boy in the Mirror

I slide into my pajamas, getting ready to sleep, and take another look in the mirror. There's a boy staring at me. His hair, wavy - a bit frizzy - lean body, and a face that says "I'm stressed, help me." A bit familiar, in fact. Though it may seem nothing changed but definitely, I know something has.

I've been bombarding myself with tiring activities every week: volleyball, dancing, lather, rinse, repeat. And stress builds up on my system. I'm used to clinging into someone after a day of stress, and right now - being single for two months and all - I don't know who to cling to. I grew a bit distant to my parents, and slowly, I'm trying to work on that, but I usually look for attention from someone else - outside the family. Because of stress, I've noticed I became a bit demanding, and controlling of the people I care about. They say I'm the strongest among us four (Elem 4), the strong-willed, the outgoing one. But then again, the stronger I become, the faster I get hurt. I don't usually let people see I'm hurting or in pain. I cry it out in my room, and tomorrow, act like nothing happened. I may be strong, but right now I'm weak. I'm very weak. I'm just looking for a post I can hold onto I guess. My emotions are, I guess, as strong as I am. That's why when it bursts, there's no way to control it. That may be the reason why I'm not acting myself lately

And if you're one of the people who noticed that about me, among the people who I hurt because of this, I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry.

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